My Heart, Which I Gave to You
by tosakuai
Summary: It's an anniversary that Naruto would rather forget, until he hears that song.  Songfic based on 'Haru yo, koi'.


Naruto belongs to Masashi Kishimoto "Haru yo, koi" (It's spring, come) by Yumi Matsutoya covered by Aiko Kayo (see bio for youtube link)

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awaki hikari tatsu niwaka ame

itoshi omokage no jinchoge

ofururu namida no tsubomi kara  
hitotsu hitotsu kaori hajimeru  
sorewa sorewa sora o koete  
yagate yagate mukae ni kuru

haruyo tooki haruyo mabuta tojireba sokoni  
aio kureshi kimi no natsukashiki koega suru

kimi ni azukeshi waga kokoro wa  
ima demo henji o matte imasu  
dorehodo tsukihi ga nagarete mo  
zutto zutto matte imasu

sorewa sorewa asuo koete  
itsuka itsuka kitto todoku

haruyo mada minu haru mayoi tachi domaru toki  
yume o kureshi kimi no manazashi ga kata o daku

Yume yo asaki yume yo watashi wa koko ni imasu  
kimi o omoi nagara hitori aruite imasu  
nagaruru ame no gotoku nagaruru hana no gotoku

haruyo tooki haruyo mabuta tojireba sokoni  
aio kureshi kimi no natsukashiki koega suru

The room was dimly lit, save for the spotlight on the singer at the front of the smoky bar. Patrons sat and watched the beauty on stage as she moved through her repertoire, turning the simple words of the songs she sang into something more that pulled on the heartstrings. A tall man with shaggy blonde hair sat tucked in the darkest corner he could find, ineffectively trying to appear inconspicuous to the other patrons as he hid his face behind the tall collar of his red cloak with the black flames emblazoned on the bottom hem. He was already in a rather somber mood, but this was something he was craving; to drown his thoughts in the haze. The songs were stirring nostalgic feelings that he buried most of the time behind a smile, but tonight he needed to let them out, if only for a little while.

The music changed into a haunting melody that he had secretly hoped he would hear tonight, but had been dreading. It was her song, the one that reminded him so much of her and how much he missed her; 'Haru yo, koi', It's spring, Come. Sakura's favorite song. He never knew why a girl that radiated confidence and poise came to love such a heart wrenching song. Maybe it had to do with the fact it was about a lover waiting for the man she loves to come home because it was spring. More than likely it initially caught her ear because it had to do with spring, Haru, the first part of her last name. Halfway through the song, he couldn't take the flood of memories that came with every heart breaking word. Standing up fast enough to knock over his chair, but it didn't even phase him, he disappeared out the door and into the night.

Once outside, his feet took him blindly to the lake. It was a crisp night, perfect for early spring. The moon was barely a sliver as it had waned almost the point of nonexistence. The stars shone brightly without the light of the moon to drown them out, but it only made him draw more into himself as he walked along the bank of the lake. The wind was calm and he could see the stars reflected perfectly in the water. Had he been looking he would have seen a solitary crane catching fish at the far edge of the lake. Right now, the rocks at his feet looked more interesting. He jumped when his sharp sense of hearing picked up the beating of the crane's wings, as it took off into the night sky. Mumbling curses to himself at his current frame of mind, he sank down on a nearby piece of driftwood and hung his head, clasping it between his broad hands, fingers disappearing into his hair.

kimi ni azukeshi waga kokoro wa  
ima demo henji o matte imasu  
dorehodo tsukihi ga nagarete mo  
zutto zutto matte imasu

sorewa sorewa asuo koete  
itsuka itsuka kitto todoku

haruyo mada minu haru mayoi tachi domaru toki  
yume o kureshi kimi no manazashi ga kata o daku

(My heart, which I gave to you

Is still waiting for your reply

No matter how many days pass

I'll still be waiting

Transcending, transcending the sky

Someday I'm sure it will reach…

Spring, unseen spring

When I stop, lost

Your gaze, you gave me dreams

Embraces my shoulders)

The meaning of the words echoed through his mind. He had made it his life's mission to bring her happiness. Team 7. What a joke. A kyuubi vessel, an avenger, and her; the woman who had taken a part of his heart and soul with her when she left. Kami-sama he missed her. Their team had been destined to fail. Had the Sandaime known that maybe he would have put them on different teams. But now that he was in charge of making up Genin teams, he knew that there would have been no other way the three of them would have fit anywhere else. Why had it always came down to that promise he had made her all those years ago? Sure, he had kept his promise, but at what cost?

Tears slowly streamed down his face, but he hardly noticed. He also didn't seem to notice the other person that had appeared and was watching him from the shadows. Sure, he could sense him, but the blonde just wasn't in the mood to acknowledge him. Thoughts swirled through his mind as the haunting melody wouldn't leave his head. She had only been looking for love, but in the end he was the one that she protected from the death blow. They had won the war, but without her to share it with it had been a hallow victory. As she lay dying, her two boys before her eyes, Team 7 finally complete, she had reached up and brushed away the tears that had been streaming down his face. Her last breath was her true confession of love, for him, not Sasuke. What good did it do him now? She was gone and had taken his heart with her.

Yume yo asaki yume yo watashi wa koko ni imasu  
kimi o omoi nagara hitori aruite imasu  
nagaruru ame no gotoku nagaruru hana no gotoku

(Dreams, shallow dreams

I'm right here

I walk alone

thinking of you

like the flowing rain

like the flowing flowers)

Naruto sat there for what seemed like hours, reminiscing about all the times they had spent together. So many memories both good and bad. Mostly he thought about the times they would train together until her hands were raw and bloody, his muscles feeling like they were on fire, both out of breath but smiling. They did what they had to do back then to reach their goals of protecting what was precious to them. For Naruto it was his precious people, Team 7, and everyone else in the village. For Sakura he always thought it was to bring Sasuke back. That is why he thought the song was her favorite, hoping that the more she thought about their wayward teammate that he would come home, if not this spring the next. Now he would never know why she loved it, but it haunted him just the same.

The soft sound of gravel moving as someone walked up next to him made him look over to his right ever so slightly. He could see the black sandaled feet of his brother. Resting a hand on the blonde's back, Sasuke knew exactly why the young Hokage had left the bar. They didn't talk much about the anniversary of her death, but he wasn't about to let his leader out of his sight on a night like this. It was sure to be hard for his former teammate and with all they had been through; it was his silent vow to their lost teammate to keep an eye on him. Her heart would have been broken to see Naruto like this. As if on cue, a gust of wind came across the lake, carrying the spent petals of the sakura trees that lined the far side of the lake with it. The wind swirled around the two men, swirling upward into the night sky as the petals danced around the two of them.

"I miss her, Sasuke," Naruto said as he slowly stood up.

"She knows," was all Sasuke said.

Naruto walked back toward town, letting his stoic friend and brother silently watch his back as they went. Unknown to both men, a translucent pink shadow watched them go, tears streaming down her own cheeks as she faded into the night.

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This is just a little oneshot songfic that popped into my head after this song was passed on to me by a friend via youtube. This is just one of those songs that doesn't want to go away and it sank it's claws in me until I wrote this down. Feel free to read and review, as it was hard to edit through tears. Hope you enjoyed.


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